“Ignore the critics. Only mediocrity is safe from ridicule. Dare to be different!”
~Dita Von Teese
I just got back from the amazing Money Mind Spirit retreat I attended the past weekend at the beautiful Biltmore Hotel in Miami with my business coach and dear friend Halle Eavelyn. It was a powerful weekend! I met so many beautiful women at the retreat and came away energized and excited about taking the next steps in my business. My plan was to share some of the nuggets of wisdom I learned as soon as I got home.
Monday was Veteran's Day, a holiday for our family with Tobias off of work and Sophia off of school. We had a lovely day re-connecting and playing games – our favorite family activity. Tuesday I felt called to clean my office and do some catching up, thinking that I’d write my blogs with the most potent does of my weekend on Wednesday.
And then Wednesday hit me. I mean like a Mac truck out of nowhere it ran straight over me – all 18 wheels! I was shattered by some unknown force that seemed to have my brain and my body in its grasp. The day started out great but went downhill fast. I was alternately sad and weepy, and irritable and angry. Throughout the day I kept noticing it. I spoke to my beloveds, I let the tears fall when they came. I managed to modulate myself so that I didn’t eviscerate anyone, like I would have in the days before my spiritual work began to soothe my tired soul.
Have you ever had a day like that?
Sometimes stuff happens. I ate a couple of corndogs on Tuesday. I know better than to eat food like that, but I did it anyway. They were DELICIOUS! But I am sensitive to corn and soy and it’s possible they were the reason I lost my footing on Wednesday. Who knows. It doesn’t matter. What matters is I didn’t rake myself over the coals on top of the deep state of agitation I was in. Now that is a victory!
Today is a band new baby day and I feel so much better.
So, as planned, I am going to share a few of the most potent learnings I had over the course of the three days I shared with a fabulous group of women and my awesome coach.
#1 – BECOME WILLING
So many times we want something different or better in our lives. We long for change. We feel stuck and in pain. But if we get really, really honest with ourselves, we might be stuck because we aren’t yet willing to be unstuck.
Are you willing to be happy? Are you willing to be successful in your work? Are you willing to experience more joy in your life? Are you willing to be loved deeply and thoroughly?
Usually what gets in the way of saying yes to these questions is our mind saying we don’t know HOW to be happy, successful, joyful or loved and loving.
This is a trap!
The how is not important – at least not at first. What is mandatory however is our WILLINGNESS to be happy, successful, joyful or loved and loving. Once we say, “YES! I want these things,” and become willing to BE these things, the Universe and Divine Guidance will move in to help us with the HOW. Say YES to the QUEST!
#2 – MAKE A DECISION
Once you are willing to be happy, successful, joyful or loved and loving, you must DECIDE to move forward on your path and leave the old way behind. Again, your mind might scream, “But HOW?!” This is not important. Use this process to help you make the decision:
- Close your eyes and imagine or feel a line in front of you.
- See, feel or KNOW that on the other side of that line is everything you desire.
- Drop into your heart, breathe into your body, connect with your Soul and MAKE THE DECISION to cross the line.
- Then in your mind’s eye step across the line and celebrate. Or for extra power you can actually stand up and step across the line and celebrate.
#3 – FOCUS ON THE NEXT SMALLEST STEP
If you are like me, getting started on a new project is fun. I am usually so jazzed that I’ll take a giant bite of what’s next only to find myself choking on it eventually. Or maybe unlike me you have a tough time getting started no matter what the project is or how excited you are about it. Sometimes that hesitation comes from a fear that the action you take will be the wrong one, so you hesitate or do nothing.
Whether starting is easy or hard for you, Halle was super clear that all we need to do is ask for is guidance on the NEXT SMALLEST ACTION we can take to move in the direction of our desires. We do not need to know every step we will take to get from where we are to where we want to be. Seriously! If we did know we would likely quit before we begin.
It’s rarely a straight line to get from A to B and despite all our best efforts, detours and challenges we always arise. Plus it’s just too much for our brain to hold.
Imagine if your GPS listed every turn you had to make all at once and then expected you to remember the instructions and successfully arrive at your destination. That would not work well at all. Rather we are given just the next smallest step to take, with a peak at the one after that. Each new step arrives in REAL TIME as we get past the previous one.
So when you find yourself freaking out about all that has to be done or happen for you to reach the goal STOP and get off the crazy train. Take a breath and remember you have an internal Guidance System that you can ask, "What is the next smallest action I can take today."
While these three steps are simple, it’s natural to feel resistance or find yourself back in that stuck place. When resistance or stuck feelings pops up, just allow yourself to start over at Step 1 again and Become Willing.
You may need to become willing over and over throughout the day.
And if you feel resistance to becoming willing, then just focus on becoming willing to become willing!
Now it's up to you to put these steps into practice and watch for evidence that the stuck energy is shifting!
In my next blog, I will share with you the two BIG BLOCKS that scuttle our efforts and keep us from breaking through to our happiness, success, joy and love.